Today was random craziness… started the day off comparing myself to Angelina Jolie and got laughed at by a Funky Chicken…tried a second time to draw attention back to myself with Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt still in the picture and got completely shut down by Brad's abs… somehow side stepped to literary connections… and faced off against a smarty pants, who didn’t find the humor in any of it. Laugh Smarty Pants, Laugh!!
Why do people in my REAL life have to mess in my happy little fantasy life? I am HOTTER, (more hot) than ANGELINA FRICKIN’ JOLIE…
In the middle of all this I managed to clean my house top to bottom, run two miles, do 200 sit ups, create Easy Bake oven SPECTACULAR cakes, all while listening to my five year old ramble nonstop nonsense.
Random sentence # 2643, “When are we going to the dentist again, he said I can come in whenever my tooth is loose?”
Me ~ “Your tooth’s not loose.”
#2644 “Yeah, but I can come in WHEN it is, sometimes he just pulls kids teeth.”
Vacuumed entire house and turned around just in time to see old dog WIPE HIS BUTT on the carpet! Picked up second child from school, dragging his tail off the bus because he and his teacher can’t seem to read the note about CAR PICK UP! Came home to struggle with 2nd grade homework, saying for the 1000th time “Went is not spelled Wint!” and “How can you misspell School, when it’s in the sentence right above you?”
Made homemade pizzas, listened to my mother-in-law freak out about the salmonella Girl Scout cookies I fed my children, waited until MIL left then Googled salmonella in Girl Scout cookies… Did Eye Spy Book with five year old, watched Air Bud while five year old talked through entire movie.
Put five-year-old to bed just in time for son to come home from basketball practice in a TOTAL panic because brand new iPod is making a funny noise and seems to be broken. Fixed the iPod, tucked son into bed, talked to Smarty Pants about catering big FUNdraiser and emailed ten people about auction items. Now I am going to stay up late and continue writing my 2nd novel…
Dear Angelina,
Try THAT without any housecleaners, cooks, chauffers, nannies or BRAD PITT to help you out!
HA! I AM smokin’ hot!!
ME
1 comment:
I never said you were not hotter than AJ... I did not comment because I got distracted by the ABS... it goes withour saying dear "ball and chain" I obviously think you are hotter. I gave you a ring not AJ!!
I love you because you make me laugh hard enough to ALMOST pee my pants!!!
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